Felt it way way too long since I said something offensive due to how true it is, so this is my most current statement; I don't do divorcees. I put them in the same mental folder as the emotionally crippled, golden shower fetish-ers, the obsessively insecure, megalomaniacs and people older than my father who think i dig viagra induced erections. Divorced people are just, for a lack of a better word, damaged. (Will leave the rest of the paragraph for open mouthed brow furrowing. Continue to the next line when you are done being offended off the cuff without listening to my explanation)
Hold your fire please and let me explain that this is indeed a generalization, I know some pretty decent divorcees but they themselves tell me to stay clear of their 'kind' due to the get-swung-in-your-knees-baggage that more than likely is part and parcel, especially the first 3 years. Like how they say all models are shallow, generally it is true but there are exceptions. Obviously. *rolls eyes flips hair and gets amused by shiny thing*
Back to topic, its not a recent discovery that 90% of my ex bfs are kids of divorce. Don't know why, there something just so needy about them which most of them spend most of their time trying to conceal. Call me strange but that is my type. The needier they are the less likely they are to do something unpredictably sabotaging you or to the relationship and that makes me feel secure and purposeful. I'm a middle child, the forgotten one, I blame that. Anyhow, kids of divorce suffer more the younger they are when it happens, due largely to the fact they haven't realized yet at 11, Disney lied. I know plenty of people who's parents seperated when they were older, say 17-19, and they say it does not bother them. If anything they admit it being somewhat a relief from the eggshells their parents did not think they were making the kids walk on.
Damned if you do damned if you dont. Kids feel self hating when young if they're parents are unhappy and stay together for them and if they're parent are unhappy and don't stay together for them. However, my ideal divorce (I'm a planner) would be one where both parties respect each other enough to admit they are indeed unhappy and instead of lashing out by cheating or neglect we can walk away adults who want to be good mommy and daddy instead of bad lao pou or lao kong. If i'm damned either way I want to do the right things by my kids and unhappy parents breed unhappy children, trust me on that one.
My bro John says people gove up on marriage too easily but i say too many stay together for the wrong reasons. Yet, both of us are pro-happiness and Everyone is, essentially. Its just how we choose to obtain it and lets face it, my generation is indeed going to be an interesting one.Yes, divorce is common even now yet it is still frowned upon. And the more something occurs, the less of a taboo it is going to be. Who knows how it will be by the time I may be faced by such a dilemma. But all i know till then there is plenty for the picking, kids from divorced families that is :)
Jaded much? Ask me about why I'm not a fan of marriage.
Love a very caffeinated Brie finishing a long everdue post before 12 in the afternoon